Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Can Ya Smell The Smoke?

I'm wracking my brain.. wracking? racking? I think it's wracking, actually, to find a safe subject to post about that won't get me in trouble, and it's a problem. I can't post about J, cuz it seems he doesn't appreciate that. Well, he hasn't done anything in the last day or so, aside from find my blog, that pissed me off or was really stupid or interesting, anyway. The weather is beautiful, and it's a great day. So, no fun there. Although, it did piss down rain, thunder, and lightning all over the Jazz Fest this weekend, which kinda sucked. I would have liked to go, but I was busy and it wasn't worth putting myself farther behind to go stand in the rain. The dogs haven't done anything particularly interesting, except Belle actually got outside today with no leash on, and she didn't jump the fence. She came right back in the house. Of course, that was only because Jen was here, and she called her to her. If it had just been me here, she would have flipped me off, laughed like a fiend, and jumped the fence in a half a heartbeat. She'd probably still be gone, or I'd be out walking the streets looking for her. Thank Gawd for Jen! I have watched a couple really good movies lately that I haven't reviewed yet, but I'm not in the mood to do a review at the moment, because they really take a while to get quite right. But, I will get a few done in the near future, I promise. Does anyone like my movie reviews? It's times like this when I wish I had one of those blogs with a zillion readers who comment and give you answers when you ask questions. The most amazing thing was when Dooce posted a couple weeks or so ago about what to teach Leta to call her "cheeseburger", and she got like 570 or more comments from people about names for your vagina...in the space of one day. 500-and-freakin-70 comments on one post. I think it was that many anyway, but I can't remember. It was a phuqing lot, that's all I know. I'll be lucky if I see 570 comments in my lifetime LOL. I could take a page from Buddha's Book of Blogging and talk about bowel movements and gastric problems, but..umm.. I think he has that covered all by himself. I can't even talk about sex, because if I do, and J comes here, he'll think I was talking about sex to lure some man to come do me. He thinks everything is somehow connected to sex. You're either having it, or looking for it. Of course, I, being the big slut that I am, have no self control. I have been known to fall over backwards with my legs in the air at the mere sight of a man. It's not pretty, but what can I do? We won't go into the fact that I recently bought a new shower massager. The comments I got on THAT one. The only reason any woman ever buys a shower massager, we all know, is to break up the monotony of her BOB. You couldn't actually have a practical reason to buy one. Now, every time I take a shower I'm just waiting for him to come in and throw back the curtain, trying to catch me doing stuff. He's not well. Oh well, I guess I'll go find something productive to do, I'll find something exciting to blog about later.

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