Shamelessly lifted from .blogdaddy This cracked me up.
A train hits a bus load of Catholic school girls and they all perish. They are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates, St. Peter asks the first girl, Tiffany, have you ever had any contact with a penis?
She giggles and shyly replies, Well I once touched the head of one with the tip of my finger. St. Peter says, Ok, dip the tip of your finger in The Holy Water and pass through the gate.
St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, Jennifer have you ever had any contact with a penis? The girl is a little reluctant but replies, Well once I fondled and stroked one. St Peter says OK, dip your whole hand in The Holy Water and pass through the gate.
All of a sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls, one girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says Lisa! What seems to be the rush? The girl replies If I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to do it before Jessica sticks her ass in it."